In our society, most people still think a university's name defines a student's ability. It's ridiculous of course, but a few years ago, I became seriously depressed because I really hated for someone to ask me what my university's name was.
        About four years ago, I got a quite good score on the university entrance exam. I wanted to go to Konkuk University, but I hadn't any luck. My friend Bo Young had lower scores than me, but she entered Konkuk University. After all, I entered my school. Unfortunately in most people's opinion, my school isn't good or famous. I became the top student, and the school promised to give me a scholarship for four years. In spite of that, I couldn't be satisfied with my school and myself, so I fell into a deep slump. I didn't want to study and come to school. I started to be absent from classes frequently, and I often went to a singing room, a theater, a drinking room, etc. I wanted to forget all my problems. At first, I was a little nervous because I was sorry to my mom, but a few weeks later I didn't care. Gradually, I lost my sense of responsibility. After all, I received terrible grades for the first semester, and my school canceled my scholarship. My hard times were getting deeper.
        When I was a sophomore, after I had a big shock, I studied harder than during the first semester and got a good score, but my slump continued. My terrible grades and the reputation of my school got me down. I wanted to be a famous person who was respected by many people, but there was one funny problem: I didn't know what I wanted to do exactly. My dream was so ambiguous, and I lost my confidence. I felt my dream was too far from me.
        The time passed so fast. A year had already passed. I still had a hard time as a lot of young students do. I was scared of my future when I graduated from my school. Nevertheless, there was one thing that changed my mind. Finally, I had my dreams. I wanted to be an English translator, a professor who teaches English, or a flight attendant, but I gave up the last dream quickly because of my short height. I knew I didn't want to lean on my father after my graduation, and I wanted to be economically independent as quickly as I could. Sometimes I was sorry even to get pocket money from him.
        I still thought my dream was located in a higher place than my ability, so I made up my mind to take a year off. I needed some time to make a plan about how to get to my destination. After I took a break, I stayed at home for two months, because I didn't know what to do first. One day, I heard Bae Yu Jung's radio program. She was introducing old pop-songs which were my favorite. I didn't know who she was until that time. A few days later I saw her face in a famous magazine, Queen. She is an English translator, an announcer, a movie critic, etc. She is in her early thirties, but she is still single. She is quite tall and thin. Her face is friendly like a full moon. She usually doesn't use make up, and she likes simple suits, for example, black and white ones. So she seems to be intelligent. After I saw her and read her life and success story, my heart started thumping. After that, I've listened to her program as often as I can. Of course, I've never seen her directly, and she has never said anything to me directly. Since she has lots of abilities, when I listen to her program or watch her interviews, I feel she is truly modest and she dares me to go to my destination in life. She never says something like a teacher or an older woman. She talks like a friend. She usually talks about pop songs and old famous singers' success stories. Sometimes, she reads a letter from a listener who was in hard times like me, and she suggests a possible solution.
        She usually says, "You can do it. Don't be afraid of yourself. Please have confidence." I remember one thing she said vividly: "A university's reputation is not important. The most important thing is your ability and your own effort to believe in yourself. You must not forget what your goal is in your life."
        I'm not sure why she said this. Maybe it was an answer or suggestion for one of her listener's problem. Some of her listeners' letters weren't serious; for example, they were about a lost dog, a temporary fight with a spouse, etc., but she was always kind and showed concern for them. Even if it did not seem like important and useful information for me, I was deeply impressed. I envy her and I would like to be like her. She is a model for my goal. If I have a goal, I'll never be satisfied until I get it.
        So I was reassured about my dream which has a relation with English such as becoming a translator, a travel guide, or a professor. After that I had about ten months until I should come back to the third year at my school. I started a part-time job in an accountant's office, and I studied English at Pagoda Institute for three moths. While I studied at Pagoda. I could get lots of information about overseas study. I thought if I went abroad it would be a really good experience to me and an advantage to get a job. So I made up my mind to go to New Zealand to study. It was so much cheaper than Canada, England, the U.S.A., etc. I spent two months to prepare to go to New Zealand, and I collected information. Finally I decided to go to New Zealand for five months. To do that, I earned a little money to buy an airplane ticket to New Zealand. I asked my parents carefully to lend me some money. I wanted to study and travel abroad for more various experience. They didn't hesitate and gave me the money, because they already knew how long I had been confused. So I went to New Zealand.
        Last month, I came back to Korea with a lot of confidence. I need to study hard to approach my goal. The goal will be like a lighthouse, and the lighthouse was shown to me by a few people--my father, mother and friends, and especially Bae Yu Jung. When I really needed someone's help, she came to me. Now, I don't have any problem, and I don't think stupid things like I embarrassment about my school's reputation when someone asks me what my school's name is. I'm not confused about my future anymore. I will just go on and on to my purpose and to my beautiful life.